"I have to pee. Where am i?" Autumn looked up as she spoke from a chair. Across from her, a doctor. Red headed, pretty, emerald eyes. " You know where you are sweetie. Same place you been ten years now." The doctor spoke in a southern accent. Very proper. "Dr Lee, is that you? did i have that dream again?" "Yes sweetie." She replied. " We had to sedate you a bit. Thought you might put another orderly in a coma. You got strong legs hun'." Autumn sat up and shook off the cobwebs. " can i pee now?" And she walked to the bathroom just outside the office door. Afterwards, she cleaned her face with cold water trying her best to escape the sedated fog. To clear away the smoke to some type of memory. She came back into the room and sat back down across from Dr. Lee. Dr Lee was an incredible therapist, a brilliant doctor. She was the only one that Autumn would open up to. The only one making some type of progress. Autumn suspected her for a lesbian but never dared ask. Dr Lee ( Lucinda, as Autumn often called her.) Went over the dream again with Autumn. They talked of the fire at the church, the attack on her and Lynn, and Katherine.
"It was real!" shouted Autumn. She took a breath and sat back again. Dr. Lee spoke very calm as she tried to separate the real from the abstract. It was like trying to navigate a vehicle over a road covered in glass and nails. Dr. Lee was wonderful at it. She would have made a great fighter pilot, avoiding all the missiles. Autumn was settled in. She was on the brink of knowing the truth but still fighting to the reality she created. An even darker escape.
"Sweetie, i need to explain this to you again. I know deep inside that you want this. I also understand how difficult it is to let go. But these dreams. They wanna come out of you, because they aren't you Dear." Autumn felt a tear escaping. Without letting her voice crack she insisted " But i was there Lucinda. I felt the kicks, the rocks. I felt that anger. I watched my loved one close her eye..." Dr Lee interrupted. " Hun, I know. But i need you to listen. You've come so far. Ten years is a long time. I have watched you grow in small steps and here we are. You are ready to hear this because i know in your heart that YOU feel it." The doctor sipped from her tea and paused as she chose her words. Autumn sat across confused, and in tears. She seemed done arguing and was ready for the truth. Or atleast that's the face she was wearing for Dr. Lee. " How can all these things not be real? You weren't their to feel the warm blood drying to your face. You didn't freeze in panic when being gang raped. I know what i...."
"Sweetie, those things happened for sure. You have experienced a trauma like no other. I am not denying you that in the slightest. But i need you to listen now. And listen good. You aren't in Los Angeles. Took nearly 6 months for you to even wake up from that coma. That's where you're brain got sorta scrambled and your life and story became intertwined with your lover."...Autumn made a fist. She didn't like this one bit. But deep down she knew. She knew where this was headed. " But what about the church Lucinda? those sick fucks who killed my soul mate?! i was there. I got freaked at Logan and hopped the bus. that was m...."
Autumn was politely cut off. " Baby, baby, baby. This is the intertwining i'm talking about. Your child hood wasn't easy. Your junkie parents were real. You're love was real. The intolerance that me you with blunt force was real. And you not gettin' on that plane was real"..." I don't understand Lucinda. You just agreed with me but you're saying i'm wrong. I KNOW i didn't get on that plane!". Dr Lee sighed and looked straight ahead, real serious. " You didn't get on that plane deary, But Autumn did. You ain't her. You're Lynn."......
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